1st doctor appointment

Yesterday was my first doctor appointment for little my little rainbow. I waited 3 long weeks to go and confirm that yes I am indeed pregnant again. I was nervous to be back in this place again. I was nervous of how many pregnant women would be in the waiting room. I was nervous of the questions I would be asked regarding Brinley. I was nervous that maybe I wasn't really pregnant.

My appointment was at 1:15pm and luckily when I arrived there were only two other people in the waiting room. My husband was able to go with me which calmed my nerves. I was called back shortly after signing in. My husband was placed into room 16 as I was taken back to get my vitals and to be questioned. 

Weight 202 

BP 160/20 

Questions.... The nurse asking me questions was very nice and mentioned that she helped shape the bereavement program at the hospital I had Brinley. She asked what I thought of the services I received over there and I told her that I was happy with them. She mentioned that they had tried a group but after about 3 years there was no attendance so they stopped. I always wondered why there wasn't a group around here so I guess now I know why. According to her my due date should be Oct 16, 2011 based on the first day of my last period of Jan 9, 2011

When I was done with her I went to the room and waited for the doctor. I was meeting with the new midwife. She was a very nice lady and happily answered our questions. She told me that since I didn't have any issues till the end last time that once the baby reached viability (30 weeks) they would have me come in and do a non-stress test every week or so. 

After she felt my uterus she said that I felt like I was 11 weeks along. I told her that I REALLY didn't think I was that far along considering I had taken a couple of pregnancy tests that were negative one on Feb 11 and the other on Feb 23. On Feb 23 I would have been 6 weeks pregnant and should have got a positive test. Another two weeks later on March 8th is when I got my first positive test so according to my calculations I am 7 weeks pregnant this week and my due date should be Nov 13, 2011. Since I was sure that I wasn't that far along she wants me to come back for an ultrasound next week on April 5th. 

After that my follow up appointment is scheduled for April 25, 2011. I have my trip for Talladega planned for the week before and plan to go and have a good time. Hopefully everything will go well with the trip. I am very excited to be going again.

Void

I think I am void of emotions sometimes. As I read the replies from Facebook on the announcement of my pregnancy there are so many people that have cried over finding out the news. For me though, I did not cry and still to this day have not cried. It reminds me of all those times I heard Brinley's heartbeat and saw her on the ultrasounds and had no real reaction. I didn't cry or really feel anything other than, yep it's a baby. I feel like I should be overjoyed and balling my eyes out but nothing....

I guess I just don't want to let myself feel too much because I will just be hurt that much more if it goes wrong.

As for the pregnancy, other than taking another pregnancy test on Sunday night I don't have any confirmation that there is a baby in there. I haven't had any morning sickness or sore boobs or any of the early pregnancy signs. I do keep having a sharp pain on the left side but then it goes away. That has concerned me but I'm sure it is nothing to worry about since it goes away. I have another week and a half before I get to see the doctor and it is driving me crazy. I want to call them and say "Hey, don't you know I lost my baby last time and that I am worried like hell this time! Don't you think you should get me in there yesterday to see someone?!" They probably would if I did call them but I'm sure everything is fine and it isn't going to kill me to wait. Not to mention I am probably still to early to hear a heartbeat or see anything on the ultrasound anyway so I am waiting.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Shhh!

Since there are only 3 of you following this blog I figured it was safe to post here.

So yesterday I was on cycle day 60 where my other cycles had been 40 days or less and I didn't feel like I would be starting my period anytime soon so I decided to get a pregnancy test after class to take when I got home. I was trying to wait until I defiantly had pregnancy symptoms because it costs money to keep taking tests that are negative not to mention the disappointment every month it comes back negative. It is so hard to keep waiting when you are trying to get pregnant. You want to know the moment you finish "trying".

Well guess what, I know now!

Congratulations! Your baby is due on or around:

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Right now you're about 4 weeks pregnant and your baby is the size of a poppy seed.

(If my calculations are correct)

That's right folks we are expecting number 2! I'm so excited it is hard to not tell everyone I see but I want to try and wait until after my doctor appointment on March 28th. So do your best to keep this a secret but if you can't I understand it is hard for me to.